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Recurring Dream About A Sister I Never Had

PostPosted: July 14th, 2018, 10:19 pm
by Declan
The dream isn't always the same but it has a recurring theme that I had a sister that was either a twin or slightly older than me that died at or shortly after birth, or just before I was born.
I can't remember much about the previous dreams, but in the most recent one, I am a teenager in my family home. As I pass by a window, I look out, and I see a young girl in a white gown, about my age, staring in at me with a blank expression on her face. On seeing her I hear a loud gong, as if to emphasise surprise, like in a horror movie, followed by panicky music. She is somewhat transparent and motionless. Even though I have never seen her before, somehow I know she is my sister and her name is Charlotte. However, in other dreams she may have been nameless or had a different name. Then I woke up screaming, or at least I thought I had screamed out loud - but I don't know for sure because when I woke up I was still in a semi dream state for a few seconds, and I thought someone was trying to wake me up and tell me it was just a dream, but when I finally got my bearings and woke up properly, I realised I was alone.

I have my own theory about this dream, and I just wonder if anyone agrees with me. I am from a family of three boys, no sisters. Growing up I was always very aware that my mother had dearly wanted a daughter, and me being the first child, she just expected me to be a girl, and she always told me that she hadn't even thought of a boys name for me before I was born. Whether she was just teasing or not is beside the point because I actually believed it. Then she expected the second child to be a girl, and then the third. I think that maybe this phantom sister is really the persona that I could never live up to?